Tonight, Canada’s four national mainstream party leaders (and one wildcard) will gather at Ottawa’s National Arts Centre for the English language debate. To occupy yourself while you twitter, and yell at the screen here’s the debate drinking game.
First, pick your poison.
If you support Stephane Dion, make sure you have some Château Pétrus on hand. Sip it slowly and savour it. If Stephen Harper is your guy, go to the corner store and get yourself some Coke Zero. Same great taste, zero calories. For those of you supporting Jack Layton, grab a can of Steelworkers Oatmeal Stout. Gilles Duceppe will be in the debate and without much of a clear purpose, if he’s your choice, just pour yourself something bitter. Finally, if you choose Elizabeth May finish your organic pomegranate with vodka and then go and mooch off of Dion. That Pétrus is some good stuff, and though and it won’t give you a hangover unlike the one that came after that thirteen year bender when the Liberals were drunk with power.
And now the rules:
If Jack Layton references the initiatives of one of his MPs, take a drink.
If Elizabeth May calls an idea/policy/person “stupid”/”ridiculous”/”outrageous” take a drink.
If Stephen Harper talks about the fundamentals of the Canadian economy take a drink.
If a leader says “George Bush” take a drink.
If Stephen Harper says “George Bush” finish the bottle and keep drinking til it stops hurting.
If a leader says in reference to Dion “you didn’t get it done”, “Mr. Dion doesn’t think it’s easy to make priorities” take a drink.
If Dion says “this is unfair”, finish the bottle.
Every time Duceppe puts the emphAsis on the wrong SyllAble take a drink.
Every time Dion seeks clarification take a drink.
If Jack Layton says “corporate tax cuts”, “boardroom/kitchen table”, “Ed Broadbent”, “Tommy Douglas”, “hope/change”, “working families”, “big oil/gas/pharma/banks” take a drink.
If Jack Layton says “big labour”, “big ass” or “Barack Obama” finish the bottle.
If Elizabeth May/Jack Layton/Stephane Dion cite Al Gore or David Suzuki take a drink.
If Stephen Harper cites Al Gore or David Suzuki finish the bottle.
Every time Harper/Layton tag-team Dion take a drink. Every time Dion/May tag-team Harper take a drink.
Anytime anyone tag-teams anyone with Duceppe, finish the bottle.
Every time Steve Paikin brings out his pleasant non-offensive wit, take a drink.
If Steve Paikin makes an off-colour joke, finish the bottle.
Add your own in the comments, and… please drink responsibly.